“It can literally pepper an enemy with pinpoint precision at 300 yards” (video, fast forward to 9:23)

(Thanks, Inigo Montoya)

The following is a transcript of Senator Joseph R. Biden Jr’s remarks after being introduced as Senator Barack Obama’s vice-presidential running mate in Springfield, Ill.

…

Folks, again, it’s not political sloganary when I say we literally can’t afford four more years of this non- energy policy written by and for the oil companies, making us more and more dependent from hostile nations on our ability to run this country and literally, not figuratively, literally putting America’s security at risk, we can’t afford four more years of a foreign policy that has shredded our alliances and sacrificed our moral standing around the world.

…

The next President of the United States is going to be delivered to the most significant moment in American history since Franklin Roosevelt. He will have such an incredible opportunity, incredible opportunity, not only to change the direction of America, but literally, literally to change the direction of the world.

…

Ladies and gentlemen, we believe that our tomorrows will be better than our yesterdays, and we believe we’ll pass on to our children an even better life than the one we lived. That literally has been the American way, and it can be that way again.

…

Barack has the vision, and what you can’t forget, you know his vision, but let me tell you something. He also has the courage, the courage to make this a better place, and let me tell you something else, this man is a clear eyed pragmatist who will get the job done. I watch with amazement as he came to the Senate. I watch with amazement. He made his mark literally from day one reaching across the aisle to pass legislation to secure the world’s deadliest weapons, standing up to some of the most entrenched interests in Washington, risking the wrath of the old order to pass the most sweeping ethics reform in a generation.

…

Ladies and gentlemen, America gave Jill and me our chance. It gave Barack and Michelle their chance to stand on this stage today. It’s literally incredible.

I don’t know who this guy is. I don’t know his politics. But anyone who can use literally that many times in one speech has my vote.

(Thanks, everyone who submitted this!)

“It’s heartwrenching. This we thought was an answer to a mystery that’s been going on for far too long. The best term I can use is: it was heartbreaking, literally.”

(Thanks, Jason, via Skippy The Skeptic)

(Thanks, Robert)

From Buffalo Springfield to CSNY to a storied solo career, Neil Young has more than made his name in the rock game. Now, thanks to East Carolina University biologist Jason Bond, he’s also making a name for himself in science.

Literally.

Bond discovered a new species of trapdoor spider last year in Alabama and set about publishing a paper about it with Norman I. Platnick, curator at the American Museum of Natural History in New York City. When it came time to name his discovery, Bond reached not into the annals of science but those of music, dubbing it Myrmekiaphila neilyoungi (teach your children how to pronounce that). While it was Young’s diverse sonic offerings that initially attracted Bond to the idea, it was the Canadian legend’s track record on sociopolitics that clinched the deal.

Link (Thanks, Christie Fremon)

Probably my favorite Nintendo game ever was Tecmo Bowl, and nothing beat running that Bo Jackson play with Oakland where Bo literally blew up all the defenders and ran for a touchdown every time. (Unless your friend had guessed that play, of course.)

I hunted down some video of Bo Jackson in Techmo Bowl, and I don’t see anyone exploding:

Link (Thanks, Randal)

This concludes the week of literally comics - special thanks to Derek!

Cornered

Special thanks to Derek for scouring the web for this week of literally comics.

Snapshots

Special thanks to Derek for scouring the web for this week of literally comics.

Reality Check (01/22/2008)

Special thanks to Derek for scouring the web for this week of literally comics.

Sherman’s Lagoon (01/31/2008)